you're a sad love song that no one listens to

do you remember when we were together?
everyone knew that we were like salt & pepper.
different, and yet we complimented each other so well.
you would hear me out on days when I needed a friend
and I would lend a shoulder even though you acted like if you did not need it.

somewhere along the line we got caught up in different lives
and realized that we were not the couple that we thought we were.
in reality, we were like salt and sugar.
the combination works for some people, but not for us.
and we ended it then and there, a mutual agreement.

after so many years, you have returned.
and although I have forgotten you
and you are no longer part of my life in any way, shape or form...
you want things to be like they were.
you want us to be what we were.
but I don't.
I am saddened by your desperation,
and sometimes your words fool me into thinking that you have changed,
but your persistence and your obsessive mode
has pushed me further away from the idea
of keeping in touch and being friends.

I have someone else.
I am happy.
I don't want you in my life.
What other way can I explain this to you besides
"leave me alone."
"I am so over you."
"let me go."
none of those seem to get through to you.

my patience is being tested.
you being the tester.
so far I am passing with my sanity still in tact.
and I thank God that what I have now in my life is good
it is positive

you on the other hand- you are proving to be a sad love song
one I used to play and sing along to.
and now I can't even remember the name or the lyrics.
I thank you for the memories,
but that is all you are to me - a memory.
one that is becoming sour because of you.

I think it's time now.
I wish nothing but a happy life for you.
I just wish you would understand that I do not want to be part of your life.

move on.
be happy.
love life.
and please, savor the silence, because that is all that you will be getting from me.


enjoy the silence
-Cin

over rated

there are so many things in life that are freakin' over rated.
like working for the sake of having a paycheck. you work and work and work. and bust your ass to get through the day and the week. just so that you can get a paycheck and pay your bills. you should work because you enjoy your job. you should work because not only does it help you pay your bills, but it also helps you become an accomplished person that contributes to society. if you work for a paycheck, you are most likely miserable. unless you're nonchalant, and nothing really matters or bothers you.
worthless acquaintances are also over rated. like I stated in another blog - not all acquaintances are friends, but sometimes they pretend to be. it becomes confusing. fuck the formalities. why can't people just be up front. if I am here to work and you happen to be here for the same reason - why can't we just be that? two people that work together. why do we have to pretend to like each other when we really do not care? and also, if we happen to have a mutual friend - we are NOT forced to be friends. there is no hidden rule that says that we all have to hang out and become bffs. a cordial hello. and an occasional hang out session is enough. stop with the pretending that you like me because of our mutual friend. it's OK if we do not get along.
anniversaries are also over rated. you go through a lot in a year. not necessarily bad memories, but just a lot. why does it have to be boiled down to one day? one day of remembering what... that you made it through another year? how depressing is that. the pressure of buying gifts for each other is ridiculous. getting upset because after 425.3 years you have ran out of ideas on gifts is ridiculous. just treat an anniversary as another day and as a great excuse to take time off from work. the love you two have for each other should be spread throughout every day that you spend together. not just on anniversaries.

having said that - I am off next week. I need a vacation from so much over rated and unnecessary bullcrap.
enjoy the silence people. I will.

Cin