all I want for Christmas is my two front teeth

I have been told on numerous occasions that I am hard to buy gifts for. I obviously do NOT agree. I like everything. My real pleasure in receiving gifts is more on the guessing why people chose the gifts they chose for me. You would be surprised as to how people interpret you by a simple gift given.

So being in the spirit and all I decided to make a list of what I really want for Christmas and then I am going to compare it to what I really get.Note that the ones that will be buying me a gift do not know about this blogspot so it will be an interesting experience.

1. let's start off with my favorite. Tiffany & Co. Honestly, how can you ever go wrong with getting a girl something from there???? Well the one thing I do want right now are some earrings. they go perfectly with my necklace. cute right?





2. this one is a bit more for the kid inside of me. This one is always fun to have around for late nights with the family or friends. plus, the music on this one is much better then the 1st one.




3. next on the line, a hooded peacoat jacket. I already own one of these, BUT I don't have it at this length and with a hood. and due to all of the rain we have been receiving here in So. California lately, I find it mandatory to have a hood on my jackets now. so here it is. black please.



4. ok so I know that this one will not fit in my stocking, but a girl could wish. sigh I will take the Edward Cullen version please. no questions asked. no strings attached.



5. and now back to reality... ok so I love keeping up with all of the new gadgets that come out, so this one is definitely a new toy that I would like to own. BlackBerry Storm 9530. Although I would prefer an iPhone, I refuse to switch to Cingular / At&t. So this is my choice through Verizon. If not, I guess I can deal with a Voyager.



6. sticking to the technological nerd inside of me... a new ipod would be nice. once more, I already own one of these, but mine is a sad 40GB one, while the one I want now is a 120GB one. the iPod touch is actually pretty cool, but so far the biggest they offer is a 32GB one. weak.


7. this one is going back to the girlie inside of me. scarves. socks. gloves. it doesn't matter from where - I just want them. warm. snuggly. comforting.
   
8. ok so it would be impossible to keep noting everything that I want... so let's finish it off with a wish. It is Christmas right? I can wish!!!! ah but I would love to be on the receiving end of this. I promise to hold still =)

man that last one was a refreshing one. I think that I am still smiling.
oh well, let's see how well this experiment turns out to be.


enjoy the silence

-Cin

its christmas time

I used to really love Christmas. Actually, I can't say that I don't enjoy it...
I just hate the stress of finding time to go out and deal with lines and lines of angry folk that waited until the last minute like I did and then exhaust my atm card so that I can rush home and wrap not only my gifts (perfectly of course) but Mr. tortilla face's as well so that we can then argue about whose house we will be heading to and then we rush to make an appearance to both families saying our hellos and goodbyes and then wait until midnight so that it can all be done in 5 minutes while we gather around the Christmas tree and everyone makes a mess in the living room with the perfect wrapping paper and bows which will then head into a large trash bag while everyone grabs their gifts which are now known as "junk" and head off to sleep.
other then that. I love Christmas. I love seeing people's faces when they open their gifts. I love finding that one gift that I know that one person will love. And I love the food cooked during the holidays.
I just want it all to be over with.

enjoy the silence
-Cin

i have a cold

I can hear the Smashing Pumpkins playing in the background
papers being separated, stapled, printed.
its not too cold today.
I think the heater is on
somebody has a pretty perfume on.
somebody is laughing and chit chatting
computers are broken down.
my nose is running
my head is throbbing
my body is starting to ache
money is being exchanged
checks are being written
coffee is being brewed
yet none of this helps or stops my cold from coming
apparently someone invited it to the wedding this weekend.
I RSVPed me plus one.
this was not the one I was hoping to take

enjoy the silence -
Cin

new addition to the playlist of my so called life

I love music. I love everything about it. The beats. The lyrics. The feelings. The everything.
When I need inspiration I turn to music. It gets me out of any rut I might be in and it helps lick any wounds that life might have caused. It brings a smile to my face when it seems that its never going to appear again. It helps me sulk when I feel like being emotional. It puts me to sleep when my mind refuses to settle.

Being the moody person that I am - I think that this is why I turn to music the most. Sometimes it is very hard for me to explain how I feel. Trust me, it's not that I do not know when I am depressed, or angry or happy. It's just that sometimes I do not know why. Sometimes my heart feels heavy and my mind races with thoughts left and right. Yet I cannot pinpoint why. I usually choose to keep this little bit of misery and frustration to myself. There really is no point to talk to others about something I cannot explain even to myself. This is when music heals. I go through my ipod and shuffle songs and wait patiently. I never know what band will do the trick, or what genre. I just know that when the right song plays it explains how I am feeling at the time. As corny as it sounds, it speaks to my heart and soul. Sometimes the songs don't add up to whatever is currently goingon. It might be a sad love song that does the trick even though my love life is okay. It might be a revolutionary punk song, or even an upbeat club song. There really isn't a style of song that I search for. I just know that once it is on, regardless of how confusing it might be... it does the trick.

Last week was a weird week for me. Something just did not feel right. I was ready to cry at any moment and I did not know what got me in this mood to begin with or what would trigger it. I just knew that I was not a happy camper. Maybe it was all of the stress because of the wedding. Or maybe the lack of sleep. Or maybe all of the lovey-doveyness I was reading in the Twilight series. Whichever way, I was a mess. And then the song came on my ipod that has made me ... different. Not just in my mood, but in other aspects as well.
Brand New - The Devil and God are Raging Inside of Me - Degausser
I've had this CD for quite some time now, but I had never really listened to it. It's not that I didn't like it, its just that I have so many other options. Well once I heard this song last Thursday, everything cleared up for me. I have been inspired. I searched for the lyrics to see if I could find a meaning in them. No luck. It doesn't matter to me really why this song. What matters is the fact that my mood has improved. That empty feeling is gone and has been replaced by this song. I hear it every day at least 3 times.
This is what music does to me. This is why it means a lot to me. If I could not share my thoughts through a song... I am not sure what other outlet I would go for. Having said that, I suggest you listen to the song and follow it with the lyrics. And now I leave you with my favorite verse in the song.

Well take me, take me back to your bed
I love you so much that it hurts my head
Say I don't mind you under my skin
I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in
When we were made we were set apart
Life is a test and I get bad marks
Now some saint got the job of writing down my sins
The storm is coming, the storm is coming in

enjoy the silence my friends.
-Cin

lucky to be me, right?

man oh man.

this coming weekend - wedding (not mine)
next weekend - birthday and party (not mine)
Christmas
weekend after that - my weekend to work
New Years
birthday (mine)

can we say exhaustion?
I haven't even started buying gifts. I still have to worry about this wedding before I can even begin to tackle the holidays.
what am I talking about exhaustion...the only thing that is being exhausted is my bank account.
I have to admit, I love giving. gift shopping for friends and family is always fun. this is why being limited due to the wedding bums me out. I hate limitations.

one great thing has happened. I got Tiffany back. yay!

on to other things - I have started taking one of my hobbies/dreams quite seriously lately. I am taking it so serious that I am looking into certain things to help me out with making this dream come true. I never like to talk about it or say it out loud because I hate to jinx myself. Yes, I know... superstitious. Still, I cannot wait until I really get some progress going. For now, I am just pushing myself.

I finished the Twilight series. Very interesting. Was it worth the sleepless nights? Definitely. Would I have made changes? Yup. Book 1 was isntant love. Book 2 was too much about Jacob and Bella, and although I understand why they went over them so much... I think it could have been cut short. Some parts did not have to go into that much details. Book 3 was gooood. I think some of book 3 could have been mixed with book 2. I don't want to say how in case someone that hasn't read them, happens to run into this blog and I spoil parts for them. Book 4 was really good, but a bit rushed toward the end. All of the explaining in Book 2 should have been used in book 4. Now follow along, don't get lost... but I would have given book 2 of book 4 to Edward and not Jacob. And I would have made a Book 5 so that I would be able to explain some parts. Having said all of that .... I still loved them. I still want to see the movies. And I am still fantasizing about Edward Cullen. (sigh)
ok now I have to go pry tortilla face from the football game so that we can go wedding-gift-shopping. I doubt it will happen though, his team is playing which means that he will not leave the television until the game is over.

For now, enjoy the chilly weather in California. and enjoy the holidays that are slowly but surely creeping up on us.

enjoy the silence,

Cin

new era

last August I was in Las Vegas on my bed in the MGM for the weekend. I remember sitting on the bed while the TV was on and I was straightening my hair. Mr. Tortilla Face was showering. The news was playing, something about some new frenzy from a lot of readers. I did not pay that much attention to it, I just remembered that a movie was coming out in November and that it had something to do with this frenzy. The rest of the weekend, this Twilight movie and book kept calling out to me. Apparently, it wanted my attention. So after the 10th time of seeing it flicker on the news, I decided to pay attention. There it was in front of me - a series about vampires. I am usually up to date with all new books and such, but this one must have slipped by. I knew then and there that I had to get these books. And that is just what I did... I bought all 4 of them.
I didn't open them though. While in Vegas, they became an extra bag with four heavy books that I had to carry around. As a matter of fact, when I got home that is just what they remained. Four heavy books in a box of other books from my collection. I kept telling myself that I would get to them, but something would always come up... like preparations for my sister's wedding and such. And then the movie came out. Now it just seemed like if it was pointless to read them. The books had become a trend and I tried to convince myself that I did not want to be part of that trend.
But this weekend - all of that went out the window. Mr. Tortilla Face left me on Saturday to go see Notre Dame get spanked by USC. I decided to stay home and chill. I knew that I was either going to sit and watch movies, sit online and listen to music, or read a book. I decided to pick up Twilight and read. So there I was Saturday night, I had just finished rocking out on RockBand, it was about 8pm, and I started to read.
I finished the book the following day at 4:15pm. holy crap I was hooked. I became a freakin' twilighter. So of course, being the dramatic person that I am - I rushed to take a shower and as soon as I got out it was Tortilla Face's turn to get out of bed and do the same. While he showered I started reading New Moon. Two chapters later, we head out to the movies.
I will admit one thing about this book - it was great. The way she writes makes it quite easy to follow along and keep reading. The story itself is my kind of story. Edward is a freakin' vampire and something inside of me has always had an attraction for these beings. Always. To me vampires=sex. If I could come back as anything it would be as a vampire. I would have to be beautiful of course. And whomever my mate was would have to be the most beautiful creature anyone had ever seen. All the others would want him, but it did not matter because he would only have eyes for me.... do you see my obsession? So when I sat there waiting for the previews to flash, I got nervous. I was really nervous to see if they would do justice to the book and the excellent story-telling. And then it started.
Being the analytical person that I am (and the fact that I had just finished reading the book), I realized that a lot of my favorite parts of this book had been omitted from the movie. And a lot of parts that had nothing to do with the book were included. I actually sat in the theater annoyed. I made the best of it and watched as the two characters interacted. I pictured them in my head like I usually do when I read. The actors could not have been chosen better. And then it was all over. Just like that. It made me sad. I wanted to rush home to continue reading. So I did.
Although I know that I am a pretty quick reader, I do have an outside life to tend to that will not allow me to sit and read 24-7. I have to work. And eat. And pay attention to Tortilla Face and my friends and family. So now, I have to play hooky with these books. I will sneak them in as much as I can. I will take them to work and read during lunch. I will prop it open and read a couple of pages and head back to work. I will take it to the gym and open it while I run my daily miles. I will read as I wait for my dinner to be cooked. And when Tortilla Face sleeps, I will read. That is pretty bad huh?
Let me explain my problem. Reading is a bit of an obsession for me. Reading a good book helps feed the obsession. Reading a great book makes the obsession lethal. Reading a great book that is about vampires is an orgasm after another (ok that might be a bit much, but you get the point). I get so engrossed by the characters and the story that I secretly wish that I was part of them. I get so involved that when I finish the book, I feel a bit of emptiness. So I rush to the next book and the next until there is no more. This is where I am right now. Wishing that Edward would run to me and take me instead of Bella. She's too pale anyways.

My only negativity - the book is 425.3 times better. I am a Harry Potter fan. And the Potter movies did the books justice. The movies flowed. This movie on the other hand, left out a lot of great parts and included parts that in my opinion - we could do with out. I asked Tortilla Face what he thought about the movie since he had not read the book and he said "there wasn't enough fighting. but the movie was ok." so it was settled, I was too much of a critic.
So here I am admitting defeat. I had said I was not going to follow the trend, yet I have now managed to post a long blog about the book. and now I will have to end this blog so that I can continue to read the book (in secret of course, I am at work).
so people, if you see me missing for a while it's not that I do not care. I just don't care unless your name is Edward or Bella.

enjoy the silence-

Cin