pillow talk

I've been listening to "indie" music recently. I wonder if that is why I've been moody lately- one of those...why am I so bothered? who rained on my parade? why do I need to have answers to that? I hate questioning shit that should just be.

A good aspect of my moodiness is that I have been able to think about things. more than I like sometimes, but my mind has been on overdrive. All this thinking has led me to feeling as if I need to do more. To get out there - where ever there is. I want to read more. I want to feel the sun on my skin and hear the ocean in my heart. I want to go to Disney and feel like a kid again. I want to write more. I want to take more pictures. I want to dance more. I want to listen to more music. I want to experience more.

At the end of the day we are nothing more or less than the sum of our own experiences. The world only exists to those who have seen it. You can't describe a feeling without having it touch your fingertips, run through your veins, change your heart beat, or raise the hair on the back of your neck.

I love those moments. Seeing something new. Feeling something new. Those moments that give you goosebumps. Those moments that you're so conscious about what you're doing...you just know its going to change the course of your life forever.

I struggle on a daily with wanting to stop time to enjoy it. Or to speed it up to embrace the change. Time has its own agenda. It waits for no one and does not look back. I've been allowing it to pass me by way too long. It is my turn to live.

Enjoy the silence -

Cin